I was talking with a friend the other day (ok, fine, I saw a TikTok) where someone said one of the most difficult parts of having a baby was going from the constant check-ins while pregnant to almost nothing. You have bi-weekly provider appointments, then weekly, then sometimes more than once a week to birth. Then it’s radio-silence until your six weeks check-up. Friends and family are the same. They continually check in and ask if the baby is here, how you’re feeling, etc, to checking in on the baby for *maybe* the first few weeks after birth, to almost nothing.
That’s just the baby side. Rarely does anyone ask the person who has just given birth how they *really* are postpartum.
Usually, it’s “how is the baby?”
“Is your baby a good baby?”
“Does the baby sleep?”
It usually isn’t “How are YOU?”
“How are you healing?”
“How’s your head?”
“How’s your heart?”
“How much are you able to rest?”
Some how we tend to forget about the person who’s body has gone through this incredible change, how vulnerable birth and postpartum are, and how much postpartum people need to hear “I care about you.”
Friends, let’s normalize asking “How are you, really?” postpartum. Who’s with me?
